Stupid people should have to wear signs that just say, “I’m Stupid". That way you wouldn't rely on them, would you? You wouldn't ask them anything. It would be like, Excuse me...oops, never mind. I didn't see your sign." It's like before my wife and I moved from Texas to California. Our house was full of boxes and there was a U-Haul truck in our driveway. My friend comes over and.says, "Hey, you moving?" "Nope. We just pack our stuff up once or twice a week to see how many boxes it takes. Here's your sign." A couple of months ago I went fishing with a buddy of mine, we pulled his boat into the dock, I lifted up this big 'ol stringer of bass and this idiot on the dock goes, "Hey, y'all catch all them fish?" "Nope, talked 'em into giving up. Here's your sign." I was watching one of those animal shows on the Discovery Channel. There was a guy inventing a shark bite suit. And there's only one way to test it. "Alright Jimmy, you got that shark suit on, it looks good. They want you to jump into this pool of sharks, and you tell us if it hurts when they bite you." "Well, all right, but hold my sign. I don't wanna lose it" Last time I had a flat tire, I pulled my truck into one of those side-of-the-road gas stations. The attendant walks out, looks at my truck, looks at me, and I SWEAR he said, "Tire go flat?" I couldn't resist. I said, "Nope. I was driving around and those other three just swelled right up on me. Here's your sign." We were trying to sell our car about a year ago. A guy came over the house and drove the car around for about 45 minutes. We get back to the house; he gets out of the car, reaches down and grabs the exhaust pipe, then goes, "Darn that's hot!" See? If he'd been wearing his sign, I could have stopped him. How many people can you give a sign to????????
Honestly, I'm not sure of the origin of this particular piece, but I found this in an archive of old emails that I had once printed. After re-reading it, I know why I saved it. It definitely appeals to sarcastic smart ass in me. Enjoy.